Some of you may know that I am a compulsive planner and that my life has been mapped out for a number of years. I thought for years and I do mean years that I was going to be a well known physician that went around the world offering free medical services. Now I am not even in college which has been extremely difficult for me. I have no doubt that I am doing exactly what it is the Father has called me to do but it is still almost like a loss. I feel as though I have lost part of who I am when the dream of being a doctor was put to bed. Sure, maybe one day I will be in the medical field but I don't know. I want to be completely alright with where I am at but it is not the easiest thing for me. I never thought I would be where I am.
On a happier note I do know a few things that I once was clueless about. God has been revealing to me my future a little bit at a time. There are things He has called me to do that I would have never pictured myself doing. At times it almost makes me nervous. The thought of doing the things I have been dreaming about the last few months makes me sick to my stomach. The Father has placed some really big dreams in my heart. Dreams of seeing people saved, changed radically and set on fire for Jesus Christ! Even though I think at times God has spoken to the wrong girl I know that I know I can do it in the Name of Jesus. We were called to do bigger and better things in this world and I want to be a part of it. I want to be a world changer, planet shaker, God lover! I pray that I am not completely off base in what I believe I have heard. I guess we will just have to wait and see what happens.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
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